Journey of a “Prodigal” – Part 3: Stuck in the Middle with You!
I’m stuck, I have to admit it, but I am stuck!!
Sitting here typing this I am reminded of the Stealers Wheelers song, ‘Stuck in the Middle’ with You, and looking at the lyrics of that song I am drawn to the lyric, particularly the first and last line:
Losing control, yeah, I'm all over the place,
Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right,
Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.
I am all over the place, and at times I lose control. It’s a real struggle! One of the things I struggle with is church, something that has been pivotal to my struggle because of my experience of it and that could make the second line relevant: church as I have experienced it is full of the loveliest, most genuine people. But it is also full of others not so lovely and much less genuine. I might not go so far as to call them “clowns” or “jokers”, but they are the kind of people that when things get tough, ‘you know who your friends are’. I have mostly come to terms with being both a ‘betrayer’ (not exactly my words) and being ‘betrayed’ so I will not belabour that point of pain here and bring this back to where I wanted to go: The Holy Spirit.
I have been pondering why many churches sit at extremes of the spectrum, some seem to ignore the role of the role of the Holy Spirit in the trinity, or more specifically, in the role of the church today. Whereas others are so Holy Spirit minded that they almost lose touch with reality, become almost fanatical with some aspects of the Spirit, his/her healing power! I believe that God does heal, through our faith in the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Like the blind man who had called out to him when entering Jericho in Mark 10, Jesus says it is the faith of the man that healed him. That man would have eventually died, his physical healing only temporary, his faith in Jesus permanent. That is also the case with us, bodies are going to fail at some point, irrespective of any healing we may receive either through medicine or the power of the Spirit. I knew a great, godly man who struggled with his faith at the end of his life because he wasn’t physical healed! He had been taught, indoctrinated even, into the belief that faith heals, and was challenged almost to breaking point when that healing didn’t take place. Yet he was, his spiritual healing was permanent!!
I believe that anything that leads to faith is important, the word, an experience, healing, personal revelation, etc., none of these trumps the other because Jesus, through the power of the Holy Spirit, is at the centre and the cause of anyone finding faith. Which is why a church that either by denial, underplay, or ignorance of the work of the Holy Spirit from in the life of the church, is not harnessing the entire power and experience of our God.
As for me in my situation, I’m not trying to find the perfect church (which apparently doesn’t exist), nor a church that suits my preferred worship/teaching style, but trying to find a spiritual home, where there is pragmatism, faith, and a willingness to accept what we don’t understand but not ignore it. In a sense, my old church where I grew in my faith fits that bill, but that would be an impossible journey at this point in my life.
Back to that song, ‘Stuck in the Middle with You’, that title of the song and the middle line mentioned above says a lot to me. I may be ‘stuck in the middle’, but I am stuck in the middle with you God; Father, Son and Holy Spirit.
“…And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”
Matthew 28:20
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